Sinless

Hebrews 4:15 - For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in EVERY way, just as we are - yet was without sin.

This truth has struck me this week in a new way. Jesus was tempted in every way ... not only tempted outwardly, but inwardly, yet was without sin. I have been fooling myself for some time now. In the last decade, God has taken me on a beautiful journey of healing and forgiveness. I am no longer prone to outward sins. I can exercise a degree of self-control. I have learned to hold my tongue in most instances. I don't get drunk. I am not committing adultery. I am not addicted to pornography. I am not lying, stealing, murdering. I am polite and kind to people. I try to recognize pride in my life. From the outside, I have cleaned up my act significantly from days past. For a long time, I interpreted this scripture to mean Jesus didn't commit these sins. And that is true. But Jesus redefined sin to include the heart and mind. And here is where I have been fooling myself.

Inwardly, in my mind and my heart, I am prone to sin. Judgements pass so quickly through the brain. Anger bursts in the nerve centers of my mind. Resentment and bitterness linger deep in my heart. Unforgiveness grows roots in my soul. Jesus was tempted in EVERY way and yet was without sin. He didn't sin in His mind. He didn't entertain sinful thoughts. Oh He was tempted, but He did not sin even in the inward places. Not only were His actions pure, but His heart and mind were too. I can barely fathom this and yet I want it. Scripture says I have the mind of Christ. I can be holy even in the inward places. I can love people with my actions and my heart and my mind. I can because Jesus lives in me.

I want to see my sin in all its ugly reality so I can bring it to Him. I am praying daily for God to truly renew my mind and birth holiness there. I want to have thoughts of love for all people and to be clean in my mind and heart.

I try to imagine the depth of the temptation Christ endured and yet remained sinless. I give in so quickly. I allow sin to play in my thoughts even if I don't act on it. In the words of Paul, "What a wretched woman I am! Who will save me from this body of death!" The answer is Jesus. Always Jesus. Teaching me, changing me, molding me into His likeness. Jesus. The perfect, sinless Savior in EVERY way.